November 15, 2005

Scenes We'd Like To See, pt 1

GLENDA: There's the house, and here you are. So, I ask you again: Are you good witch or a bad witch?

DOROTHY: Well, I already told you, I'm not a witch at all. Witches are old and ugly! **high pitched giggling** What's that?!

GLENDA: The Munchkins. They're laughing because... I am a witch.

DOROTHY: Well, beggin' yer pardon, Ma'am, but I've never heard of a beautiful witch before.

GLENDA: Only bad witches are ugly.

DOROTHY: Well, then, beggin' yer pardon, Ma'am, but if good witches are beautiful and bad witches are ugly then why are you asking me if I'm a good witch or a bad witch?

GLENDA: Uhmm.... **high-pitched giggling** What's that...?!

Posted by Tuning Spork at 09:33 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 14, 2005

The Great Raid

When I was about 7 or 8 or 9 years old, back in the early '70s, my paternal grandfather (whom we called Grampy) was driving us up along a familiar stretch of highway that I would years later learn to call the 25-8 connector. I'd travelled this route many times before with my mother at the wheel. But, recently (at the time) a new sign had appeared:

Colonel Henry Mucci Highway

"Colonel Henry Mucci Highway," Grampy muttered. "Hmmph... Good."

Although I wondered, I never asked him who Col. Henry Mucci was. In fact, up until about a week ago I had no idea who Henry Mucci was.

Colonel Henry A. Mucci is a native of my hometown; Bridgeport, Connecticut. He led a team that rescued about 500 Americans held prisoner by the Japanese in the Philippines. The POWs were survivors of the Bataan Death March.

The Great Raid is a new release from Miramax that tells the story -- apparantly in muted (meaning honest, not cinematic) tones -- of the rescue of those 500 Americans. I've read several glowing reviews this past week and, yes, I may actually set foot inside a movie theater in the next few days for the first time in over ten years.

One review is not so favorable It comes from the desk of New York Times critic Stephen Holden.

This 132-minute Miramax film, completed two years ago and dumped into the marketplace during the dog days of August, reputedly cost $80 million. Not since Ted Turner's stillborn boondoggle "Gods and Generals" has a war film squandered so much on such emptiness.

Scott at Powerline destroys Holden's posturing and also points to Judge William's short review.

I'll, in turn, point you to this review.

Can a man be called a hero if he's "just doing his job"? That, I think, depends on what he thinks his job is.

Posted by Tuning Spork at 05:26 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

December 26, 2003

Unseen Movie Review: The Matrix

[Dunno if this'll become a regular feature, but I shall now review a movie that I've never seen.
Just because I've never seen it doesn't mean I'm not allowed to form an opinion of it, does it?! Well, does it?!]

First up: THE MATRIX:

What the hell is this movie about?
I've seen a lot of ads and promos and heard a lot of chatter about this series and still, to this day, I have no idea if this thing even has a plot.

Oh, sure, it's supposed to have great special effects... I've seen those commercials where the frame is freezed and then the "camera" does a 45 degree "turn" to show the 3-D action frozen. But, is that all it is? I have no frickiin' idea!

I saw a promo where Keannu Reeves (I presume) is engaging in something that looks like it's supposed to be some kinda hand-to-hand combat. But, it looks to me to be something more like a crystal meth induced session of knick-knack-paddywhack. What the hell is going on here?!

I get the feeling that The Matrix is all style with no substance. But, I'm open to being persuaded otherwise by anyone who can gimme a clue about what the hell this mess is all about; 'cause the promotion department sure hasn't given me one.

Posted by Tuning Spork at 08:50 PM | Comments (2)
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