May 10, 2004

The Good Friday Massacre

Well, that's what I've been calling it. Financially, I had a really really bad month of April. Why? Because I've become a doddering, forgetful schmuck.

I got paid on Good Friday and went to the bank to deposit my paycheck. But, duh, the bank was closed.
Okay, no biggie. I'll just deposit it on Monday. No prob!

So, Monday comes along. Then Tuesday. Then Wednesday.
I went through the drive-up window at the bank to deposit a Gemm check (from my on-line record sales semi-biz) and, lo and behold, my receipt shows a negative balance. Huh?

I went inside and asked for a printout of my account for the past week or so. Four checks posted on Tuesday evening -- including my rent check.
Since my bank is evil and posts all new checks in descending order of magnitude, my rent check posted first; sending me into the red. The three remaining checks followed suit, all of which automatically deducted a $28 overdraft fee. Four of 'em. $112. Gone.

Whenever all of the checks are posted on a given evening, and the account is in the red, the Evil Banking Computer of Doom begins to reject the debits in the same order that they were posted.
So, my rent check was sent on it's merry way back to my landlady's bank. The remaining balance (even though missing $112 of MY MONEY was plenty enough to cover the remaining three checks.

So, even though they were honored, I was still out the overdraft charges. Why? Because my bank is evil and posts checks in descending order and then not reverse the charge when the check is honored just to screw me out of my money!!!
But, that's not all, of course. My landlady is going to be assessed, by her bank, a $30 return check fee. Guess who pays for it!
Yep, $142. Me be pissed.

So, wait a minute! Didn't I get paid of Friday? Didn't I deposit my check at lunchtime like I always do?
Oh, yeah! It was Good Friday! That means I deposited it on Monday, right? Right?! But it doesn't show on the printout of my account. Where the hell is my paycheck?

Right where I left it on Friday night: on my dresser. D'OH!!!!!!!!!

I never used to forget things. Ever!

So, I went back to the bank on Thurday to cash my paycheck. "Cash" because I wanted to give my landlady the rent in cash (plus $30 for the return check fee) because her mortgage was due in the next day or so.

After cashing the check I went to banklady Myrna's office to plead idiocy and see about maybe reversing the overdraft fees. I was there on Friday! The holiday screwed me up! I never deposit paychecks on Mondays! C'mon, have mercy on a doddering forgetful schmuck!
She agreed to meet me halfway and reverse two of the four overdraft fees. Yay, Myrna!!!
So, I was still out $86. That'll teach me... er... something. I think. I forget.

The Good Friday Massacre is only ONE of my financial setbacks in April. The second happened on the 23rd. I'll leave details of that one for another day as it's yet unresolved. But, rest assured, I've got the Office of the Attorney General, State of Connecticut on the case. mheh.

Posted by Tuning Spork at May 10, 2004 08:23 PM
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